You didn't notice me

Amos 4:10b But you didn’t notice me. You continued to ignore me.

Everyone wants to be noticed. One of the deepest human longings is to be seen by someone else, and that longing is what drives the quest for intimacy. It’s what children most desire from their parents and what partners most need from each other. Too often, the patterns of every day living, the small adjustments made to avoid conflict come between partners and get in the way of really seeing each other. Instead, I see the person who disappointed me or hurt my feelings, and slowly, incrementally, my reactions to past events block out the shape and essence of the person standing in front of me.

So how do we get back to really seeing each other, paying attention that is really giving each other our full attention the way we do in those first heady rushes of falling in love? How do I wipe the glass clear of the past so I can gaze without hindrance on the face of my beloved? Perhaps this can help: Can I see the other with the eyes of God? Can I see the face of God in my partner’s face and open my eyes to the wonder of who he or she is? Can I see anew with the eyes of Love?

Prayer: Dear God, As I struggle to move forward in a way that pleases You and honors us all, help me to use your eyes and heart to truly apprehend my partner, who he is and what he needs. Then give me clarity to properly discern my path. Amen.