Become simple and elemental

Matthew 18:4 Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, like this child, will rank high in God's kingdom.

Working in MS last week, on Katrina relief, has felt just like an "elemental experience"! I even mentioned this verse to some people who were working there with me, and it connected with their experience, too. Here's why I think this was an elemental week:

1. I actually was in the elements a lot. Though we were working in homes, much of our work brought us outside, and even indoors, we had all the windows opened. We were constantly in and out; when it rained, we got wet.

2. I was working with my hands, slapping mud (mortar) on the floor, cutting tile with a wet saw, laying the tile, smearing on the grout and wiping it off. Very tactile. Even though we did use a lot of machines -- power tools and such -- there's something basic about doing stuff with your hands.

3. I was in a new place, away from my home and usual connections and associations. There's a freshness, a basic experience of being in the world, when we're away from our routines and all those reminders of who we are supposed to be.

4. Our accommodations were very basic: metal bunkbeds with small foam mattresses, sleeping in sleeping bags, the bathrooms were across the compound, we ate in a big room all together. It was kind of like adult camp.

5. Because I was far away from my usual context, I was also kind of disconnected from the past, and too busy to think about the future, in a kind of "free" zone. Tasks kept me very present oriented, and being in the moment is about as elemental as it gets.

6. Basically, I was an apprentice, in a position of learning from others, most of them decades younger than me. I was doing something I don't normally do, that I am definitely not expert in.

7. I worked really hard every day, feeling quite tired by the end of it. That kept me in touch with my body and how it works, what it needs, how to take care of it.

8. The satisfactions I came away with were also elemental: a job well done; helping others. There was nothing fancy, no big accomplishments. Didn't even get to see the complete finish of the job we were on, so the successes were small, moment to moment things.

9. I wasn't responsible for anything, except showing up and working. At home, there are so many things I am involved in, there's always a list in my head; I am always juggling things that need to get done. This was simple and basic: follow the routine, show up, do your best, your time off's your own. In that way it was a real break from business as usual.

It's easy to lose touch with what is simple and elemental in our complicated lives, and last week was a great reminder of what is simple about living. Showing up, doing your best, taking care of yourself and your community. Sharing. Giving. Serving. I guess that's why I keep going back.

Prayer: Dear God, It's so easy to get caught up in the complexities of life and forget the basics. Help me remember what is simple and real, and stay connected to that when life gets complicated. Amen.

He slipped away by himself

Matthew 14:13, 23 When Jesus got the news, he slipped away by boat to an out-of-the-way place by himself...He stayed there alone, late into the night.

The "news" is the beheading of John the Baptist, the Forerunner, as the Eastern Orthodox refer to him, but also Jesus' cousin. What did that news foreshadow for him about what was to come? What sorrow did it bring up, that lonely night on the mountain? Did he pray for John? for Elizabeth, John's mother, and Mary, his own? It must have been a great loss to him. He needed to be alone, to pray, to reflect, just to allow his responses time to work themselves out.

I need time alone, too, sometimes, to process challenging situations, to deal with complex emotions, relationships, events, that I am trying to figure out, trying to understand in the context of my life, my faith. It takes time and quiet and solitude to come to clarity about where I stand in relationship to some of the difficulties that arise from living. And sometimes, there's nothing in particular going on, I just need some time alone to decompress. Like now, I am in Mississippi, at Mission on the Bay, a joint project of Episcopal Relief and Development, and Lutheran and Episcopal Services in MS trying to rebuild the coast from the devastation left by Hurricane Katrina. Yes, there's still lots of work to be done! My church sends a group here once or twice a year, and we spend the day working on houses: doing carpentry, painting, installing cabinets, floors and roofs, even windows and doors, plumbing, just about anything you can think of. This week I have been tiling floors.

It's great fun, working with wonderful people, and we always have a good time, despite how tiring it is. But from morning to night -- waking up and walking into the bathroom that's already full of people (there are 80 some here this week, although they often have up to 200), eating, working all day at the job site, dinner and evening, reading or chatting in the common room -- there are people around. I have to be very conscious of my need for a little quiet solitude every once in a while, or I'll start getting cranky and irritable and not really know why. Or I'll start feeling stressed and lose that sense of light-hearted enjoyment, that joy of service which is a lot of why I come. There is no better example of how to deal with life's difficulties, or even just the importance of a little alone time than that of Jesus climbing up a mountain to pray alone and undisturbed.

Prayer: Dear God, Help me recognize those times when I need to be alone to sort through what life presents to me. Help me hearken to the call of solitude. Amen

You'll begin to sense His Grace

Matthew 6:8 Here's what I want you to do: Find a quiet, secluded place so you won't be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you'll begin to sense his grace.

What a lovely description, not only of how to go about praying, but also what the purpose is: to present ourselves "simply and honestly" before God and connect with Her. Mary Oliver describes it in her poem Praying:

It doesn't have to be
the blue iris, it could be
weeds in a vacant lot, or a few
small stones; just
pay attention, then patch

a few words together and don't try
to make them elaborate, this isn't
a contest but the doorway

into thanks, and a silence in which
another voice may speak.

In my silent prayer of contemplation, I sit with gratitude and open my heart go God's presence. I stay -- or keep returning when I get carried away by thoughts or feelings -- in the present moment, where God dwells and let go of all the stuff that wants to pull me into my head. i have glimpses of what the Buddhists call "Basic Goodness" and what I think of as the Presence of God and I find myself restored, renewed and refreshed. It's simple; it's just between me and God, and it connects me in a way nothing else does.

Prayer: Dear God, I thank you for all the traditions and practices that have struggled to find You, that I can reap the benefit of their wisdom. Thank you for Your Presence in my life. Amen

Live out your God-created identity

Matthew 5:48 In a word what I'm saying is "Grow up!" You're kingdom subjects. Now live like it. Live out your god-created identity. Live generously and graciously toward others the way God lives toward you.

In the familiar verses of the Sermon on the Mount, Eugene Peterson's The Message paraphrase just pops with freshness and vitality. This whole verse shows up in the NRSV as "Be perfect therefore as your heavenly Father is perfect" and look at the way Peterson connects the dots for us. Who on earth is "perfect" and what does that even mean? But if we look at God, and how God is, in particular how God deals with us, we get some idea: God treats us with kindness and mercy, and that is how he expects us to deal with our fellows.

This verse is the culmination and summary of the command to love your enemy. Peterson shows us how this call to love one's enemy takes us out of the usual tit for tat way of doing things, the usual way of trying to get back at those who harm or try to harm us. Jesus here calls us to a higher purpose -- to love as God has loved us, in the face of and in spite of all the unloving things that we have done, and that others have done to us. We are to act as if we were perfect in that way, even though we will never be. We are to take that generous gift of mercy and grace and pass it on to others regardless of their worth or lack thereof. We are to pour out the overflowing cup of God's love and compassion to all of this broken world mired in hate, hurt, fear and pain. That is both God's call and God's promise. That is how the world is transformed; that is the Kingdom of God on earth.

We have been reading Jesus Freak at my church. In it, the author Sara Miles describes a food pantry that has no lists or criteria, no requirements, but that people show up and ask. They rain food on the just and the unjust alike and don't question whether the people showing up are "really" poor or "deserve" to get free food or not. When it's a gift, no one can take advantage of you! This is the kind of free giving Jesus talks about. People cheat because they haven't experienced generosity of spirit, because they live in a world of scarcity rather than God's world of abundance. Experiencing that kind of giving can really call people into a new life. It's infectious, a virtuous cycle that begets more giving, more love, more generosity of spirit. And that's something I want to be part of!

Prayer: Dear God, You have shown me a vision of your Kingdom through Jesus's words. Help me to give generously to all, and to live in the freedom of abundance which is your Kingdom on earth. Amen.

Embrace it!

Mark 8:35 Don't run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I'll show you how.

I have come to believe that the primary purpose of the spiritual path is to engage our very humanness and the suffering that is an inevitable part of living. When I run from my suffering, I generally make it worse. If it is a painful emotion that I try to seal off, I often end up sealing off other feelings as well, like joy and love. If I try and avoid a painful situation, it is liable to get worse until I can't avoid it. And I know from my own life, if I run from challenges, if I think I can somehow escape them, all I am really doing is putting off the inevitable confrontation with whatever it is I am afraid of, and in the meantime it has probably just gotten more entrenched.

What following Jesus has shown me is how to embrace my suffering, by which I mean fully experience it without shrinking or shirking, with the love and support of God who is always with me. No, it is not always fun. Accepting and experiencing painful stuff doesn't make it go away. But I find I can bear it, with God's help, and the help of my community, and use it as an opportunity to learn more about the suffering of others, and as a catalyst to open my heart in generous compassion.

It seems to me that suffering gives us a choice: I can let suffering close me off to others, embitter me with a "Why did this have to happen to me? it's not fair!" attitude, or I can recognize that suffering comes to everyone, and the suffering in my life can help me better understand those who may be embroiled in a kind of suffering I can't even imagine. That is, I can close myself off to others, see my suffering as an individual fate unfairly meted out to me, or I can see my suffering as a bridge, a bridge of compassion that connects me with others. One direction leads to hardness of heart, anger, bitterness and isolation; the other leads to connection, joy and freedom. It seems to me that after 9/11 we as a nation had the opportunity to recognize, in the catastrophe that was visited on us, what we have in common with so many other nations that are suffering worse fates: the Israelis and the Palestinians; the victims of war in the Congo, Sudan and other places; the victims of terrorism all over the world. There was a moment that we could have built stronger relationships of understanding with places that might otherwise have seemed so entirely unlike us. We took a breath, and then moved quickly into "Us vs. Them". It was an opportunity lost. I don't want to lose that opportunity in my own life.

Prayer: Dear God, There is so much suffering in the world, and I can experience only a tiny part of it. I thank you for the ways you have opened my heart through suffering, that you have stood with me and helped me bear it. Give me that power to stand with others in their suffering, so that they may bear it and find the gifts that lie beneath its dark waters.