With the measure you use

One from the archive:

Matthew 7:1-2

Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

I was with a group of friends and we were talking about how hard it is to deal with critical people. What I’ve noticed, though, is that people who are critical of me are often that much more critical of themselves; maybe the only letup they have in their relentless self-persecution is when they are persecuting someone else! And the things they criticize about me are probably the things they feel most critical of themselves about – or most defensive about. So the measure they are using to criticize me is the same measure, only worse, that they use to criticize themselves. So maybe I just have to let it go, and recognize that they are suffering under something much worse than they have inflicted on me. Then, one of the group threw a whole other spin onto it. She said we don’t judge others not just because we don’t know what they’re suffering themselves, but because judgment, whether of self or other, puts us in God’s place. So it’s not my job to judge others – or to judge myself. I need to take responsibility for my behavior, seek forgiveness or make amends when necessary to make up for mistakes I make, but never to judge. Only God judges.

Prayer: Dear God, When someone is critical of me, help me not to take it personally. Help me recognize that they may be struggling, that I don’t know the whole story, and that it is not my place to judge others but only to extend kindness. And help me to treat myself in the same way. Amen.